The Day From Hell

Today has been one of the worst days that I can remember. It started with me waking up on day 6 of feeling like crap. I couldn't breathe, was in a bad mood, and I knew that I have to go to work because I've already taken two sick days. Well, it was a very long day. We had a lot of teachers out, were short subs and the kids thought it was party time because their routine was rocked. I felt terrible and the day drug on forever. I had two dr's appointments right after work....one for my family dr because I'm sick and one for the eye doctor because I need new contacts and have to have an exam before they will issue them. 

I ran out of work to go to the family doctor for being sick. Then I found out I was going to see (we will call him Dr. Jerkface). They fit me in last minute so I had no control over who I was seeing. I've had two bad experiences with this jerk. The first time, he left me waiting for an hour as he forgot about me in a room. Awesome. THEN, the second time I went to him, he misdiagnosed my "simple cold that will go away soon" and it turned into full bronchitis which took me 6 weeks to get over. And it was BAD. No apology and somehow made it all seem like my fault. Well today, he refined the art of being an asshole. First, he made me sound dramatic for seeing him. He says, "You just haven't given this enough time. It's a virus, it takes 7-12 days to get over." I love how I'm automatically supposed to know that it's a virus. And how STUPID of me to go to a DOCTOR when I've been sick for 6 days. So he said there was nothing he could do. Good times.  Then he implied that I'm not thinking clearly if I'm on antidepressants and anxiety medicine while trying to conceive. He implied my baby doctor isn't fit if we haven't discussed this. Um, screw you? Later he tells me I'm out of my prescription year for both of those meds. I ask if we can do that while I'm here and he says, "Sorry, we only fit you in for 15 minutes. We don't have time. You will have to come back." Ugh! So yeah, needless to say it didn't go well and I left with the intention of never going back. 

Next, I went to the eye doctor and waited AN HOUR to be seen. It turned out okay, the people that work there are really good people, I just wanted to get home. 

Once I got home, I was greeted by trash all over my apartment by my beloved dog. Apparently she can break through doors now with the intention of making a mess. I wanted puppy hugs so bad that I let it go and held my dog. I felt better for about 5 minutes....

Then my bathroom flooded! Yep, I couldn't make this stuff up. The toilet overflowed and I have about 4 inches of water sitting on my bathroom floor. Some shoes and books are ruined and there's not a plunger in site. When the water wouldn't stop gushing I just cried and cried. And you know how I am on this progesterone, once I start crying, I can't stop. 

I had the classic "I hate my life" moment when I realized that I was experiencing PMS symptoms. With PMS comes a period and with a period comes no pregnancy. Of course this made me cry more and I just had another one of my very low moments. I just don't understand why my life has to be so hard. It's like I'm meant to be alone. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong to not deserve these things in my life. I'm always the one that gets left, lied to and cheated on. Why do all of those people have happy lives and I'm left to suffer? It just doesn't seem right. I feel like God has given up on me.

I'm gearing up for another negative and I know it's going to break my heart again. I'm also running out of money so I don't know what I'm going to do after this. Feeling very hopeless and defeated....


Comments

  1. UnknownSeptember 25, 2013 at 8:04 AM

    ::hugs:: Friend, my heart is breaking for you. I wish I had something to say that would make it better, but I'm not sure there are words. Just know that I'm praying for you and pulling for you.

    ReplyDelete

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