The Value of Support

I am a member of a single mother's by choice support group and it is a spectacular group filled with extraordinary women with the same desires to have children, with or without a husband. I am blown away by how much we understand each other, it's the ultimate bond. We grow to love each other's children and dream of our future children growing up together. It's so comforting to have that kind of support. I am so very blessed. Today I hosted our monthly party at my apartment-we had a Fiesta! It was great seeing everyone. 

Today I am not feeling so hot. I didn't get much sleep last night and I had a headache all morning and have been mildly depressed all day. I have NO idea why, everything is going great. I also skipped dinner tonight-nothing sounded good and I'm going to go to bed really early. I even had a nap but am still so exhausted. Everything feels like a blur.  I would get excited about this thinking it could be a pregnancy symptom but I think it's too early for that. I think I just feel really off because of lack of sleep. I'm curious to see how I feel tomorrow. 

I've also been feeling some apprehension about not getting pregnant. If it doesn't work this first time, I need to come up with more money for the next one. I have enough for one more then I need to get creative. I wonder if I will ever need ink dye tests or surgery from fibroids and pollups and all that makes me nervous. My biggest fear in my life is that something will be wrong and I will be unable to have children. It's been on my mind a lot. It's not that I think it will happen, it's that I've started the process and if I do have problems, they will show themselves very soon and it will be devastating. 

I'm gonna chalk today up as an off day. I'm going to go ahead and go to bed early and hopefully I will feel better tomorrow. 

Comments

  1. UnknownAugust 19, 2013 at 9:31 AM

    It's hard not to worry - (don't I know it) - but you are going to be just fine. ::hugs::

    I'm glad you have the amazing support of your SMC group.

    ReplyDelete

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